Sport

WSCR-AM afternoon host Dan Bernstein Wednesday night confirmed what many women have believed, but no man would ever confirm: Men get distracted by "giant boobs". In a reply to a tweet by co-worker Matt...

In a new partnership that will give hockey fans an unprecedented look into the lives of their favorite players, EPIX and the NHL have teamed up with the Chicago Blackhawks as part of this year’s "Road to the Bootycall Classic."

"SB Nation, Bleacher Report and Deadspin all need to check their facts," said a spokesman for the Associated Press. "Either that, or maybe come up with a new way to say that a defender was fooled by a basketball move."

"The team has spent considerable money on renovating the bleachers, and the engineers are concerned that the constant barrage of towering Kris Bryant home runs may damage the integrity of the stadium and severely hamper the construction process," said Epstein. "Obviously, safety is our top priority. So it is for that reason, and that reason alone, that we will wait to promote Kris to the big league club until the bleachers are deemed structurally sound."

When asked for his secret, Derusso credited his no-nonsense, oldschool approach to bracketology that he attributed to the St. Louis style of baseball he so strongly supports, as well as general inexperience and pure luck.

"There are a lot of ups and downs in baseball," said Lester, who signed a six-year, $155 million free agent deal with the Cubs this winter. "Unfortunately sometimes that involves health issues, like this bloody stump where my pitching arm used to be."

"We have finalized the catering for the event, and there will be a whole mess of crab legs there from Shaw's. And if someone, say a Heisman Trophy winner with a history of controversy, were to take some extras home with him? Well, we made sure our event staff knows to let that happen. Heck, we're encouraging our attendees to take all the leftovers they can carry," said Goodell.