Monday, November 23, 2020

Lance Armstrong confesses to Oprah that he loves Katie Holmes

For the first time in history, both men and women alike scrambled to find the Oprah Winfrey Network in their cable guide on Thursday in order to see the big confession interview of one Lance Armstrong. Like all those who followed and worshiped Lance through the years, they were met with massive disappointment.

Lance Armstrong to time-travel and admit doping back when people actually would’ve cared

Obviously if I admit to drugs now it doesn't make much difference," he said, referring to the fact that he was recently outed as a habitual user of banned substances. "But if I travel back to like, 2007 or something, then an admission would curry me just the kind of public sentiment I'd need to keep my ego -- and endorsability -- intact."