Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Astros players all sold their stock right before coronavirus hit because someone told them...

In a shocking revelation, the same guy who told the Astros players what pitch was coming also told them a global pandemic was coming so they better sell off some stocks.

Marlins expect attendance to increase 100% by importing Korean soccer club’s sex dolls

Not exactly what Abner Doubleday had in mind when he invented baseball, the Miami Marlins plan to use sex dolls disguised as fans in the stands when baseball resumes.

Wellness Check: Second City & SNL writer/performer Katie Rich

Today's Wellness Check is with Katie Rich. She's a writer who spent six years at Saturday Night Live and Second City before that. Listen here!

MLB owners meet with NCAA to learn how to convince their athletes to play...

“I think what’s best for everybody in this situation is if the owners keep all of the money and the players play for free,” said Yankees’ owner Hal Steinbrenner. “We want baseball to be played this year. The players want that, the fans want that and we want that. We are willing to do whatever it takes as long as it doesn’t involve making less money.”

Socially distanced Cubs to begin the season by having Javy play all 9 positions...

As MLB works to institute a plan to resume play this summer, the Cubs announced they intend to socially distance their players by having megastar Javy Baez play all nine positions at the same time.

Wrigleyville mourns loss of dumpy store no one visited for 20 years

"That place had the coolest stuff," said 42-year-old John Hicks. "I remember my grandma used to take me there after Cubs games and let me pick out one pack baseball cards for $1 each."

‘Extremely bored’ Len Kasper joins GWAR

Cubs TV broadcaster Len Kasper revealed via Instagram Wednesday that he has reached an agreement to tour and record with thrash comedy rock band GWAR. Kasper, who plays bass, made a pitch to the band via social media and instantly hit it off.