Thursday, February 9, 2023

Theo Epstein quits Cubs to take on coronavirus

With the MLB season on an hiatus of unknown length, Cubs President of Baseball Operations Theo Epstein announced he's quitting his job to focus on becoming an epidemiologist which has long been his secret fallback career.

Ozzie to back Canseco’s movie

After reading a New York Times report that Jose Canseco offered to leave Magglio Ordonez's name out of his next tell-all book if Ordonez would financially support a movie endeavor of Canseco's, Sox manager Ozzie Guillen has decided to bankroll the film completely.

Inflated Wrigley Field attendance figures include seagulls, vendors

“If you think about it, seagulls are pretty self-aware,” said Wrigley staffer Lester Fitz. “I mean, they could leave if they wanted to. We count them because they chose to be here.”

Coghlan surges to lead in All-Star balloting

“To me, my vote was all about the numbers,” claimed Old Town resident Stu McGregor, who spent his Sunday afternoon voting for Coghlan the maximum 50 times on his iMac and another 50 times from a second account on his iPhone. “The Cubs are undefeated when Coghlan starts this year, while the Nationals are winning only about 60% of Harper starts.”

Joba questioned after empty boxes found in Rafael Soriano’s home

The Yankees hope it’s much ado about nothing. Rafael Soriano isn’t so sure.

Sammy Sosa’s 41 Hall of Fame votes disqualified when cork discovered in ballots

"We were also disappointed to hear that all of Mr. Sosa's well-deserved ballots were discarded simply because of this one single ballot. Mr. Sosa did not intend for this ballot to be released, as it was a ballot that he primarily uses for practice."

Interview: Cubs Trainer Dave Groeschner

Outside of Wendell Kim, perhaps no one has been under the gun this season more than new Cubs trainer Dave Groeschner. While he has a huge role in the fate of the team, few fans know his name or would recognize him on the street. We caught up with the man who might just be the hardest working trainer in the business.