The down-and-out Chicago Cubs have decided to part ways with Kyle Schwarber after a miserable 2020 campaign in which the misplaced left-fielder struggled mightily at the plate.

“As an organization trying to make a dollar out of 15 cents, we can no longer afford an outfielder can’t bat his weight,” said President of Baseball Operations Jed Hoyer. “That’s a goal of ours in 2021: Bat your weight.”

Added Hoyer: “Once we clear out half our lineup, we’ll pretty much be there.”