"Tiger's great and claims he's gotten his partying days behind him, but I'm not so sure" said Vonn, referring to the very public 2009 meltdown of Woods' marriage amid rumors of vast and wild infidelity. "The other day I got a series of sexts from him that were totally hot, only he kept calling me 'Chastity' during them, which was kind of weird."
"President Obama has practically declared a war on American golf," said Romney. "Under his watch, American participation at all levels in this grand sport has plummeted. When I'm elected, I pledge to get Americans back on the golf course where they belong."
"I know there's a big age difference, but what can I say, it just works with Keegan and me," said Mickelson. "I can't live without him. I just hope Amy and the kids understand."
"It was a simple mistake really," said Club Chairman Billy Payne. "We've thought it was 1962 for the last 50 years because the damned calendar from that year in our clubhouse was never replaced. Simple mistake really."
"I'm not so sure about this whole pro golfer-thing anymore," said Mickelson. "Sure, I've got a loving, beautiful family, millions of adoring fans, and a massive fortune, but golf just doesn't seem to be doing it for me right now."
From Tebowing to Bradying, fan poses have taken the Internet by storm. Here's a list of the other popular poses that will soon be taking the web by storm.
Despite having been dead for six weeks, former North Korean leader Kim Jong Il made a triumphant return to the golf course on Monday and soundly beat Tiger Woods in a match played on Kim’s private course in North Korea.