NFL

Bears fan Matt Hunter quickly became enamored with quarterback Matt Blanchard after witnessing the undrafted rookie run a two-minute drill to near perfection.

Brian Urlacher split with girlfriend Jenny McCarthy just days after undergoing knee surgery. Both parties indicated that the decision was mutual, but insiders say McCarthy's diagnosis of Urlacher's injury as “knee sniffles” may have been the final straw.

Bears players were at first excited to hear that Jay Cutler would be reading passages of his new book at a team meeting. This excitement quickly turned to horror when Cutler read snippets of his erotic novel debut -- “Fifty Shades of Jay” -- the story of a passionate love affair with the QB, written from the perspective of a recent female college graduate.

Bears leadership is urging fans not to worry that Brian Urlacher emerged from surprise surgery on his knee Tuesday morning with a bloody stump where his lower leg used to be.

Team names are fun, but they don't always accurately reflect a franchise's players and fans. Here at The Heckler, we've created a few alternate names and logos that are more descriptive of the teams they represent.

“I wouldn’t even have noticed him because it was business as usual,” said season-ticket holder Roy Hiller. “I was just watching Tebow overshoot his intended target by about seven feet, and then I hear a loud audible ‘Aww, c’mon!!!’ coming from the bushes. That’s when I saw Brett.”

"We're also hoping to hire a ref that can see without glasses," he said. "Maybe even one or two that can analyze a replay in less than 30 minutes, though I can't make any promises on that front."