After Trevor Bayne’s first career Sprint Cup win in the Daytona 500, offers for sponsorships and jobs fell at the newly famed driver’s feet. Deciding to keep his loyalty to his home state of Tennessee, Bayne landed the job of a lifetime at the local Piggly-Wiggly bakery.

“I’m going to milk this thing for all it’s worth because next week my new full-time ride starts at the Piggly-Wiggly with Saturday morning bakery delivery,” said Bayne. “This will build up my momentum, provide me valuable driving experience and hopefully in 30 years enough people will know me in racing to give me a job.”

Drivers also got down to business this week when Carl Edwards officially filed a motion with NASCAR questioning the outcome of the race.

“Who the hell is Trevor Bayne? Nobody’s heard of the punk. I thought he was some hick in a nameless ride one lap down. I was the clear winner of the Daytona 500,” said Edwards. “There should be a standing rule in NASCAR that 10 people need to know who you are before you can officially win a race. I’ll take this all the way to the Supreme Court if I have to.”

When NASCAR officials were questioned about the validity of Edward’s claim, they were hesitant to comment on any possible rules changes for future races and any changes to the outcome of the Daytona 500.

“Who? Oh yeah, the kid who won the race. Trevor-something is his name,” said NASCAR president Mike Helton. “Unfortunately, Trevor whatever-his-name-is was not one lap down and won the race and the outcome will remain the same no matter how much our sport suffers because a no-name driver stole the spotlight.”

By Morgann Spicer

Morgann Spicer