Mike Pereira hospitalized for exhaustion after analyzing replacement ref footage
Pereira is resting comfortably in an area hospital after checking himself in for exhaustion due to three weeks of reviewing and discussing tape of botched, missed and simply bad calls.
Goodell found hiding in spider hole with Gary Bettman
With the help of the FBI, Goodell’s cellphone was tracked to a remote field in Wyoming. Authorities searched the area for several hours before finding a welcome mat in the middle of the field.
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Wisconsin farmer invents fleet of ‘robot’ referees
Upon investigation, however, the “robots” were found to be mostly goats and other wildlife sewn into scarecrows, with tape recorders that occasionally blurted “NO CATCH.”
Unions suddenly extremely important to Paul Ryan, rest of Wisconsin
“Before we were dealing with frivolous issues, like education and teachers," said Ryan. "But now we are dealing with the Packers, America’s team, who lost a game because of these greedy billionaires and I will not stand for it.”
Struggling Saints bring back bounty program
"We used to be a lot better when we illegally paid our players to put dirty hits on opposing teams' offensive stars with the intention of knocking them out of the game," said interim coach Aaron Kromer. "So we have to go back to that right away before this season gets even more out of control."
Goodell forced to legally change name to ‘Badell’ in wake of replacement ref debacle
In a surprise ruling handed down by a court in New York, America's top football man will no longer be allowed to use any surname that incorporates a positive reference.
