‘Greatest game ever!’ says guy who watched last night’s World Series contest on mute
One viewer lucky enough to watch Thursday night's insanely entertaining World Series Game 6 on mute -- devoid of McCarver and Buck -- believed he had just witnessed the greatest sporting event of all time.
‘Human Victory Cigar’ Brian Scalabrine to be shot out of cannon at Bulls halftime
“I wave the towel, pat guys on the bottom and even tell Boozer to guard someone," said Scalabrine. "I am all about team. If stuffing me into a cannon and exploding me across our home court into a small netting can gives us an edge … I'm all for it!"
‘I bet the Packers are going to tank just to screw the Bears!’ says...
"The one time I find myself rooting for Green Bay, I know they're going to tank against the Vikings Sunday just to screw the Bears," said Emmert, blissfully ignorant to the fact that a Packers win in Minneapolis solidifies a first-round bye for Green Bay.
‘I’m glad we lost because now the pressure to go undefeated is off’ say...
In the wake of their first loss in the season to the lowly Chiefs, fans of the Packers have taken to message boards and office water coolers to awkwardly and unconvincingly express their "relief" that the their team "doesn't have to worry about that '16-0' target on their back anymore."
‘I’m not worried about the SI jinx,’ Quenneville says while smashing mirrors under a...
"I don't see what all the fuss is about, to be honest," Quenneville said while opening an umbrella inside the press conference room.
‘Joe Buck’ trending on Twitter for some inexplicable reason
Sportscaster Joe Buck was recently one of the highest trending Twitter subjects, and was therefore validated as inexplicably relevant for a period of time.
‘LaTroy-like’ bullpen spoils Marquis’ gem
Jason Marquis' impressive performance in his Cubs debut was marred by a bullpen meltdown in which a one-run Cubs lead quickly turned into a three-run deficit, from which the Cubs never recovered, losing 5-2 to the hometown Cincinnati Reds.
