Wednesday, June 29, 2022

Panic-stricken Lance Berkman buys 26 crates of Twinkies

"Of course I'm sad, but the time to grieve will be later," said Berkman. "Right now, it's all about the hoarding."

Cardinals game postponed after ‘Free Sleeveless Tee Night’ sparks riots

For many St. Louis residents, Christmas came early this year when the Cardinals held their first and last "Free Sleeveless Tee Night." Unfortunately, fans could not stay calm for the mesh, 100% polyester Cardinals tee, sparking riots.

Wood shocks Chicago by claiming return only possible with Cardinals

"To be quite honest I'm done playing," Wood said. "On the off chance that maybe a year from now I change my mind I can see myself pitching for St. Louis. That's it. They've always done a great job resurrecting careers."

Angels list Pujols as ‘Dunn for the year’

The prognosis from Los Angeles Angels team doctors is as worst feared: 1B Albert Pujols has been officially pronounced “Dunn for the year,” as in Chicago White Sox 1B/DH Adam Dunn.

Epstein declares ‘Mission Accomplished’ as Cubs take series vs. Cardinals

After the Cubs took their second game of a three-game against the Cardinals Tuesday night, team President Theo Epstein could be seen kicking his feet up on his desk and drinking a tall Sam Adams.

Cardinals send Albert Pujols his World Series ring mounted on the middle finger of...

Any doubts Albert Pujols had that the Cardinals were harboring ill-will toward him after he left the team for the free agency millions of the Angels, were erased when he opened his mail Monday morning and discovered his 2011 World Series ring had been shipped to him on the middle finger of a cadaver’s hand, on dry ice in a Cracker Jack box.

Cubs ‘kinda’ appreciate being part of Cardinals’ World Series celebration

“I actually tried to have the Cardinals’ ring presentation in Chicago," he said. "That way, I could have lived up to my expectation to bring a World Championship to the North Side years ahead of schedule!”