Saturday, May 11, 2024

‘Jameis Winston Defense Attorney’ listed as most secure job in America

"Mr. Winston is young, high profile, with great long-term earning potential and always seeming to get caught up in some sort of legal drama," said the publication's business editor Bill Freeman. "That's a defense attorney's dream right there."

‘I still have a perfect bracket!’ brags lying coworker

The dirty, no-good liar has been overheard making such clearly false claims as, "Mercer over Duke? Totally had that one picked", "North Dakota State? Come on guys, that was an easy 12-seed upset pick" and, "Ha, look at all these suckers who picked Ohio State over Dayton."

Putin takes big lead over Obama in NCAA pool after first round

While Obama showed moxy in picking his alma mater, Harvard, to upset Cincinnati, Putin was dead-on with his selections of underdogs Mercer, North Dakota State and Dayton. Putin’s only losses occurred with picks of New Mexico State and St. Joseph’s, both overtime losers.

Nick Saban grimly smiles over tattered remains of Auburn voodoo doll he constructed

"It didn't have to be this way. You should have let us do your dirty work for you," Saban lamented over a doll of mascot Aubie the Tiger containing a single dread from Tre Mason's scalp.

Mississippi St. checks ‘Win bowl game sponsored by car parts company’ off their list

When Mississippi St. started their football season back in August, head coach Dan Mullen gathered his players after practice one day an laid out a long list of goals. Tops on that list was winning a bowl game sponsored by a car parts company.

Last-second loss to Auburn quietly drops Alabama out of the top 25

After a lackluster effort on the road last weekend, Alabama has fallen all the way from No. 1 in the country to out of the top 25.

Alabama vs Chattanooga and FSU vs. Idaho highlight College Football’s National Cupcake week

In addition to the exciting match-ups of Alabama vs Chattanooga and Florida State vs Idaho, Clemson will also be taking on the Citadel.