"We're looking to get these kids from the Wicker Park and Bucktown neighborhoods here to the games," said president of baseball operations, Theo Epstein. "We wanna see more handlebar mustaches and Buddy Holly glasses. Any woman wearing suspenders or leg warmers will get a discounted price. Bring your vintage cameras and satchels. Unicycles are welcome."
In a 6-1 decision, the Illinois Supreme Court has ruled that raising children to be fans of the Chicago Cubs baseball franchise is "cruel and amoral." The case before the court involved 24-year-old plaintiff Jimmy Benson, who was suing his parents Laura and Gerald for punitive damages stemming from years of being forced to watch and root for the Cubs.
Of the many promotions this season, perhaps none was more successful than "Throw Up, Throw Back Day" during a game with the Atlanta Braves when fans were invited to puke at-will in bathroom troughs, a normal practice during the 1969 season.
Previous recipients played an entire season through unbelievable adversity. However, none of those people could hold a candle to the man who was able to hang like a rock star in Vegas getting drunk on the back of an inflatable swan, all the while never missing a single OTA.
Overnight Nielsen television ratings showed that 20,657 Chicago White Sox fans, the exact average number of people attending the team’s games this year, watched the mid-season classic.
With reports over the weekend that the Chicago Bulls had reached deals with Pau Gasol, Nikola Mirotic and Kirk Hinrich, the Bulls appear to have taken a big leap forward in contending for the NBA title of most white players on an NBA roster next season.
"We didn't care about the Heat for the four-year period between our first championship and the signing of LeBron, and we sure as hell won't care now," said George Varela of Pompano Beach.
"If you look at it, only about 25 percent is destroyed," said Sal Wellmuler of Shaker Heights. "About half of the rest of it is covered in soot and char marks. There's got to be a way to get that stuff out of it, right?"