After dropping two of three in Houston and getting swept in St. Louis against the Cardinals, Maddon came up a good idea for their next road trip.
“Look, I’m getting tired of doing these post-game press conferences and the first thing you all ask me is ‘Who are you?’ or ‘What are you doing here?’” said Lopez after Monday’s game.
The stress of managing the “Lovable Losers” appears to have already taken a toll on the Cubs skipper. After his second consecutive sleepless night on Sunday, Quade arose Monday morning in Cincinnati to an unusual sight – tufts of hair sprouting from his head, shoulders and back.
“I’m not sure if Chico’s Bail Bonds is a real company, but I’m not one to pass up a potential new revenue source,” said Ricketts. “I am also contemplating changing our team colors from red and blue to yellow and white with ‘Bad News’ stitched across the front. This is awful!”
Citing his unwillingness to adapt the league to keep up with professional football and basketball — as well as an unbearable “old man smell” — baseball owners voted Bud Selig out as MLB Commissioner. The lone dissenting vote came from Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf, also a crotchety old man.