Chicago

After being grilled by the Sox front office, Cooper eventually came clean, claiming the online effort to out the Sox skipped we merely a joke.

A day after the Sun-Times announced it was laying off all its photographers, the newspaper released a "bold new plan" to capture the visuals associated with the news it reports, anchored by stick figure drawings and reporter self portraits from the field.

The Cubs announced Friday that they would celebrate their 2013 BP Cup win with a 6,000-sq. ft. banner in the left field bleachers. Cubs officials are extremely excited about the banner rasing ceremony, which will take place this September before the Pearl Jam concert at Wrigley Field.

"What do you mean there are more games?" asked long-time Hawks fan, Doug Jameson, who was watching the game from Cunneen's bar in Rogers Park. "They just beat Detroit in seven, man. What else do they [NHL] freakin' want?"

"It was Denis Savard," said one Cubs fan, wiping a tear from her eye. "He sang 'take me out to the ballgame' during the 7th Inning Stretch. He opened our eyes and made us see what was really important in this world. Not this simple game between two mediocre baseball teams, but the Stanley Cup! It's really all about the Cup!"

“I’m off to learn 3D printing," said Tedeschi. “Then I can just print out new players when anyone on the team gets hurt.”

White Sox broadcaster Ken "Hawk" Harrelson is known as a bit of a homer during his team's telecasts and sometimes yelling at the umpires on close plays. Now he's blaming the umpires somehow for a long-standing tradition on the South Side: the low attendance at US Cellular.