"It's just too hard to find smart athletes, so I am gonna see if smart kids can play ball," he said.
Late Thursday night, baseball historians at the Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, N.Y., accidentally dug up what has proved to be the authentic birth certificate for Wrigley Field, revealing its date of birth as April 30, 1899, confirming the venerable old park to be 113 years old, over a decade older than the historic home of the Green Monster.
After again failing to reach the NCAA Tournament yet again despite a sometimes promising season, Bill Carmody's Northwestern Wildcats were forced to settle for the NIT, but they weren't the least bit disappointed.
“I really thought that soul-crushing, overtime defeat to Michigan a while back would seal the deal," said Northwestern coach Bill Carmody. "But ESPN’s Joe Lunardi still says we’re among the last four teams to make the NCAA."
“First off, the travel schedule would be killer,” said Delaney. “The speed chemistry season would inevitably create conflict with science fair season, which is immediately followed by the National Star Trek Convention and the World of Warcraft Festival. These kids wouldn’t give that up.”
Following Illinois’ 38-35 victory over Northwestern Saturday, ESPN play-by-play broadcaster Beth Mowins was given praise by many viewers for her call of the game. “It was brutal,” said Illini fan Gary Wendell. “She was as bad at calling the game as most of the men at ESPN.”
"A lot of people assumed we'd do something that made sense like split the teams up by geography or name them after our most famous alums, but why take the logical route?" said commissioner Jim Delany. "And there's no way we're changing it, no matter how stupid even our most die-hard supporters believe it to be."
12Page 1 of 2