University of Illinois basketball coach Bruce Weber says he was shocked to read of his recent firing by athletic director Mike Thomas, admitting he thought Thomas had fired him months ago.

“Let’s face it,” Weber said. “I haven’t brought in a decent basketball player in six years. People wonder why I coach with a surprised look on my face–I’ve always been surprised that I was still coaching.”

When asked why he kept appearing on the sidelines after he thought he had been fired, Weber shrugged.

“I like watching the guys play, and that always seemed like the best seat. Nobody ever stopped me from coming down there. I thought it was part of my severance package.”