The revolving door known as the Dallas Cowboys head coaching position is hitting close to Chicago. Bears defensive coordinator Ron Rivera flew to Dallas Tuesday to interview with Cowboys owner Jerry Jones for the team’s vacant head coaching spot.

If hired, Rivera shouldn’t even unpack his bags. Since Jones purchased the team in 1989, he has employed five head coaches, none of whom lasted more than five seasons. Jimmy Johnson, Barry Switzer, Chan Gailey, Dave Campo and Bill Parcells have all called the arrogant hands-on owner “boss.”

Always-selfish Cowboys wide receiver Terrell Owens stayed true to form as he expressed his distaste at the thought of hiring Rivera or any other candidate interviewed for the position.

“Hire a new head coach? For what?” Owens shouted at a press conference in his driveway. “I think we all know who should be coaching this team and it’s T.O.”

heckler editorial staff