Perennially lost at the bottom of the NBA standings, the Washington Wizards are attempting to get people into the stands anyway they can. This year that has included trying to lose so badly and comically they make their opponents look like Globetrotters, which has drawn legal action from the Washington Generals.
“We simply sat the team down and explained there was going to be new plays,” said GM Ernie Grunfeld. “John Wall was excited to be carted off the court in a clown car for his nightly injury and Andray Blatche simply had to do nothing new.”
One of the 130 Wizards season ticket holders is Red Klotz, owner and head coach of the Globetrotters’ punching bag Generals. Unimpressed, Klotz has decided to sue for copyright infringements.
“I have seen some of the trademark Generals game play these Wizards games,” said Klotz. “Last week they used the exploding ball trick on the ref, and I’m pretty sure Kobe hit a four-pointer. Also, why does JaVale McGee keep getting calls for ‘funny business’ while the ref is getting a wedgie?”