In a surprise Christmas announcement, NFL Commissioner and alleged sock puppet Roger Goodell confirmed the league would be implementing White Elephant rules during the upcoming 2020 draft, scheduled for May.

“We just want to shake things up and keep everyone on their toes throughout the draft, ” Goodell stated. “Plus, it’s really fun and great for league morale.”

According to a document shared by Goodell on Twitter, the team with the first pick will select a player, as in years past. All teams that follow will have a choice to steal an already drafted player or to pick from the undrafted.

“To keep things fair, if the Browns…I mean…if the team with the first pick hasn’t had their drafted player stolen, they can switch drafted players with another team, if they choose to do so,” Goodell added in his announcement.

The new rules will be implemented into all 15 rounds of the draft, and should further lengthen an event that is already dragged out enough as it is.

Nick Coffman