March 2018 12
Willson Contreras breaks the 6 mound-visit limit in the first inning of season opener
"We had a nice lead early and Jonny [Lester] needed to calm down a bit," said Contreras, "so I did what good catchers do and visited my pitcher as often as possible in the first inning."
Sister Jean breaks up with Drake, now dating DiCaprio
Sister Jean decided she had had enough of Drake and and she was onto bigger and better things.
Sister Jean declared academically ineligible for Final Four
The Loyola Ramblers, a true Cinderella story and the most relevant Chicago-based basketball team since Dennis Rodman became the voice of reason for North Korea, will be without their star player, Sister Jean, for the Final Four after being declared academically ineligible.
Cusack, Belushi celebrate lifelong, die-hard Loyola fan status
“Whoo-hoo! Did you SEE that win? The Ramblers are my team!” exclaimed Belushi by Skype, sporting his new, fresh-from-the-bookstore-via-FedEx Loyola t-shirt and brightly colored scarf. “And they always have been, in my sweet home Chicago.”
John Fox prepares for new ESPN job by dodging his own questions
“I started preparing by interviewing myself in the mirror. It’s interesting how my answers are thorough with surprisingly little substance. This job may be harder than it seems.”
Sister Jean’s fame reaches new heights as she’s linked romantically to Drake
It’s been a whirlwind week for Sister Jean Dolores-Schmidt, the energetic nonagenarian superfan of Loyola Chicago Basketball. First she was seen in the stands as her beloved Ramblers basketball team defeated the Miami Hurricanes on a buzzer beater.
