Citing a changing media landscape and the “premier nature of social impressions” during this year’s Super Bowl, Facebook has announced it will charge users $1 million per status update between 5 p.m. and 9 p.m. today.

Anything determined to fall under the category of “meme” will cost the user $2 million.

“We live in a dynamic media world comprised of digital and traditional channels,” said Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg. “If NBC is going to charge $4.5 million per Super Bowl commercial while everybody in America is busy playing on Facebook, we feel it’s time to monetize what the big blue thumb brings to the big game.”

The news sent shock waves throughout the nation, prompting many average Americans to re-think their social media strategy.

“Normally, I’d just fire off a snarky post about enjoying my fifth slice of pizza or whatever, but now I have to really up my game. This is the one time of year people will be watching to see if Mike Benson can bring the funny,” said Mike Benson, a Chicago area accountant. “A million dollars is a bit steep, but this is how you make a splash in today’s ‘me culture.'”

Not everyone was excited about the rate hike.

“Why spend all that money during the Super Bowl when I can post for free any other time of the year?” asked Debbie Rodell of Omaha. “I’m pretty sure the world can wait a few hours to see a picture of my kids playing with crayons. It’s not worth $1 million, I guarantee you that.”

The move is expected to net Facebook upwards of $10 trillion.