When he first picked up a badminton racquet, Chas Steeger wasn’t expecting he’d eventually represent his country in the Olympics.

“I was totally hammered at my buddy’s barbeque and saw what I thought was a tiny tennis racket and started hitting the goofing cone thing at some of our friends,” said Steeger. “Turns out it was a sport called badminton and I was actually pretty good at it. I had no idea it was an Olympic sport and, to be honest, I’m still kind of surprised it is.”

Steeger is heading to London this week where he’ll participate in his first Olympics on the USA Badminton team. He’s been playing competitively for more than a year, but still sticks to the BBQ origins where he discovered the sport.

“Turns out I play best with a beer in my left hand,” said Steeger. “I guess the Olympics don’t allow you to drink alcohol while playing, so I’ll have to carry around an O’Doul’s, which kind of sucks, but I’ll have to deal with it.”

While he’s not looking forward to eliminating beer from his playing routine, he is eagerly anticipating the rampant sex he’s heard goes on in the Olympic Village each year.

“I can’t wait for that but I do have a hard time believing badminton players get any real tail so I’m probably going to tell all the chicks I see that I’m in a sport that’s more believable to be a part of the Olympics,” said Steeger. “Probably something like table tennis or kayaking.”

hecklerbrad