Peggy the Siberian credit card customer service rep from Discover Card has been retained by the Blackhawks to help forward Patrick Kane score more goals. Although Peggy has no hockey experience other than the advice Kane gives him in their TV ad, coach Joel Quenneville said something needed to be done.

“I think everyone has had enough of his Kane’s spinning around shit,” said Quenneville. “Hopefully Peggy can convince Kaner that NHL goals do not always have to make ‘Plays of the Day’ no matter how hard he tries.”

Kelley Green