The writing was on the wall that the 2011 college football season would be full of catastrophes the minute the Terrapins walked out onto the field to play Miami back in September in uniforms that could be best described as shockingly hideous.
With 16 different horrific jersey and helmet combinations to choose from each week, the Terps spent more time going over fashion schemes instead of the playbook. Head coach Randy Edsall said his team needed a spark and decided to end their Under Armour partnership now that the season has concluded.
“We thought we’d try to look cool like Oregon football but instead we just looked stupid like Oregon basketball, ” Edsall said as he poured gasoline over all the gear Under Armour had provided for the team. “The Salvation Army won’t even take this stuff.”
Under Armour’s CEO Kevin Plank seemed unfazed.
“From day one this has been a painful process,” said Plank. “I’ve always said that no one who lives south of Houston Street has any fashion sense. That flag ick, what was I supposed to do with that flag?”