Lakers owner Jerry Buss has known about Kobe Bryant’s impending divorce for over a month now, and has taken steps to help his superstar player with the enormous settlement cost.

“Kobe told me that this would be happening in November,” said Buss. “Why else do you think we let the Clippers run the free-agency floor? Give me a single Kobe Bryant, a ball boy, the guy who played Urkel, and Stevie Wonder, and we will still beat the Clippers.”

Vanessa Bryant filed for divorce from her husband of 10 years in Orange County Superior Court. According to various sources, all matters were handled privately, which will allow the couple to avoid going to court for a settlement.

“Kobe has done so much for the organization,” said Buss. “We felt we couldn’t let him wave bye-bye to the $360 million he has made during his tenure as a Laker. As soon as the papers are signed, the team is prepared to offer him a contract that will recoup anything he loses to Vanessa. Of course to do that we had to get rid of everybody but that is what an organization does for a player in need.”

Buss did not seem worried about the team’s chances over the next few years.

“A tremendous weight is off his shoulders now. He has been weighed down with guilt ever since he brought syphilis back from Colorado. Just you wait and see; no one is going to be able to stop Kobe Bryant this season. That, I guarantee.”