The Mets locker room had an uninvited visitor Thursday when FBI agents seized the cell phone of pitcher R.A. Dickey for “precautionary reasons” in light of the Anthony Weiner scandal.
“They told me there was a correlation between hilarious last names and inappropriate behavior involving cell phone cameras,” said the stunned knuckler, who has not yet been charged with any wrongdoing. “It’s kind of puzzling because I’m not a big tech guy. I didn’t even know my phone had a camera.”
The fan response thus far has been split. One faithful Dickey fan, a self described “Dickhead,” claimed nothing would derail his love of the scruffy starter. Others weren’t so quick to dismiss the charges.
“It’s disgusting what he did,” yelled one inebriated woman during Dickey’s start in a win over the A’s Thursday. “Now we know what else he does with his knuckles!”
The Mets, who can ill afford even more bad press, believe Dickey’s phone will ultimately come back clean.
“This is a little ridiculous,” said manager Terry Collins. “I mean, sure the guy’s name being Weiner was funny at first, but that was a month ago now. Leave my damn players alone.”
While Dickey awaits word on the contents of his phone, the FBI has moved onto their next target, Islanders owner Charles Wang.