Why They Might Be Good: Over the summer, future first-ballot Hall of Famer Kevin Garnett told the entire Wolves roster, “I know you guys stink, and you know you guys stink, so I intend to shoot the second the rock touches my hands.  This sharing-the-ball thing ain’t working.  If you don’t obey me, I’m going to shove the $1.5 billion I’ll earn this year right down y’all’s throats.”

Why They Might Suck: G.M. Kevin McHale put together a roster using a system he likes to call “Pick a Player’s Name Out of a Hat and Trade For Him, and if He’s Not Under Contract With Another Team, Sign Him as a Free Agent.”  This explains the presence of center Mark Blount, forwards Eddie Griffin and Trenton Hassell, and bench jockey Mark Madsen.

The Dude Other Than Garnett Who I Want on My Fantasy Team: Ricky Davis.  The hyper-athletic guard can apparently figure out his shooting percentage to the 15th decimal in six seconds flat.  Anybody who’s that obsessed with his stats is a-okay with me.

Bottom Line: For the past six or so seasons, the Wolves have been tagged with the label “underachievers.”  This year, if they win 35 games, they will have overachieved.  Nice work, Mr. McHale.

heckler editorial staff