The usual excitement following a big win Sunday is missing from Halas Hall because Bears QB Mitch Trubisky hasn’t allowed the facility’s TVs to be turned back on and no one who works for the team is aware of their 20-13 victory over the Lions.

“Last week when Mitch said he wanted the TVs off, everyone here listened,” said the team’s director of sales James Willis. “Unfortunately, what didn’t get reported was that he also wanted all forms of media banned. I’m talking laptops, phones, newspapers, radio … everything.”

As a result of Trubisky’s blackout, Willis and all other Bears employees are just now slowly learning about Sunday’s win.

“It’s not been that bad, actually,” said Willis. “Sure, I missed out on our win, but I also missed out on a ton of shit like people posting cat memes and writing ‘Okay Boomer’ on all my Facebook posts, so it’s a trade off I’m willing to live with.”