Mike Matheny, former manager of the St. Louis Cardinals, abruptly left the team this morning to join the Chicago Cubs, just as his stud pitcher John Lackey and star slugger Jayson Heyward recently have done.

“What’s the use?” Matheny asked stunned St.Louis reporters. “The Cubs booted us from the postseason, they sign our Game One starter for less money than we offered, they take our best player for less money than we offered and I’m left with the wretched refuse — and those are just the fans.”

The Cubs offered Matheny less money than he was making as Cardinals skipper, with rumors saying he will be paid in the area of 200-350 dollars and all the fast food he can consume.

On his way out, Matheny hinted that if things continue to go south for Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel, St.Louis Mayor Francis Slay would be interested should an opening become available.