NBC hockey analyst Pierre McGuire was on hand for the dramatic double-overtime finish between the Anaheim Ducks and Chicago Blackhawks Saturday night, and he notched some record-breaking statistics of his own.
McGuire has a reputation for being the NHL’s most commonly muted analyst, as his voice tone, coupled with facts about Saskatchewan-based farm teams, often causes suicidal thoughts. Known for stating random and irrelevant facts throughout the game, he set a career high Saturday by mentioning 740 useless statistics, ranging from types of equipment nobody cares about to sharing which players are giving each other looks on the bench.
A few highlights from McGuire’s record-breaking game include:
“You know Eddo, Corey Perry has just been great at allowing me to continually use the phrase ‘mayhem’ which I pre-planned on using for anyone playing physical tonight.”
“This Jonathan Toews and Ryan Kesler rivalry goes back to a Sainte-Marie Quebec Cub Scout popcorn fundraiser in which Toews sold 16 tins of caramel corn to Kesler’s 12 cheddar cheese blend.”
“Ducks equipment manager Brian Douglass is actually the brother’s, sister’s, second cousin of legendary backup goaltender Eddie Crewczech who played four seasons with the Quebec Stampeders Junior B team.”
“I hope this game ends soon so I can take the red-eye to Pittsburgh to make Sydney Crosby breakfast in bed.”