Hoping to avoid losing 100 games for the second consecutive season, the Cubs replaced several current stiffs on the team with a bunch of news stiffs when rosters were expanded on September 1.

“I’ll be damned if we’ll lose 100 games again,” skipper Dale Sveum told Cubs.com. “These new guys are here to contribute to the ball club.”

Among those added to the roster are Luis Valbuena and Ryan Sweeney, who were on the disabled list, along with pitcher Daniel Bard pulled from Boston’s scrap heap. The Cubs also recalled yet another set of underachieving minor leaguers, seven in all.

“When I heard Valbuena was coming back, I was really surprised,” Sveum said. “I thought we cut him a couple of months ago. Wasn’t Bard retired from baseball and working at a T-Mobile store?”

So he is able to identify players by sight, Sveum will wear a wrist band, similar to those worn by quarterbacks, which will contain photos of new players.

“The hell of it is that just about the time I put everyone’s face to their names, the season will be over,” Sveum said.