The Marlins have won two World Series since emerging in the ’90s, yet the ballpark remains unnecessarily huge and empty. It seems as if the team couldn’t develop a fan base if they literally played with their pants on fire.

But one intrepid supporter shocked the world when the Marlins played the Rays Thursday. After a home run off the bat of Justin Ruggiano flew halfway into the second deck, Florida resident Andy Kelley reached most of the length of two full seats to intercept the ball as it bounced by, but fell asleep in the middle of the effort.

“Sometimes I’ll sneak out of work and come here instead of the beach because it’s quieter,” said Kelley, after waking up again for an interview. “Those home run balls are a menace, though. Tried to grab that one, but if I don’t get a full ten hours of sleep a day I … I’m sorry, now I can’t think. Excuse me.”

Kelley said he is known as one of the biggest Marlins fans around because he usually knows when the season is occurring.

Bandwagon Dan