Just minutes after the Blackhawks’ 6-2 loss to Colorado Friday night, the living members of the 1972 Dolphins again annoyingly toasted the continuation of their reign as pro sports’ most recent undefeated team.

“For a while we only did this after the last remaining undefeated NFL team dropped a game each season,” said Mercury Morris, the who’s only claim to fame and reason for living is having served as a running back on the ’72 Dolphins. “But then we realized we could get a lot more publicity if we celebrated every time the last team in any league wasn’t going to go undefeated. It keeps us busy and makes things much more interesting.”

Reveling in the Blackhawks’ first regulation loss of the regular season, Morris sipped champagne with former teammates while looking over his celebration schedule for the next few weeks.

“Apparently a high school basketball team in Maine just suffered its first loss of the season, so we’re heading there after this,” Morris said. “Then it’s on to India where a professional cricket league just lost its last undefeated team of the year.”

Morris added that he and his Dolphins teammates are also available for hire at weddings, bar mitzvahs and celebrity appearances at oil change shops.

Image by Vince L.