Three days after Marilyn Hagerty’s pleasant review of a local Olive Garden went viral, Detroit Tigers first baseman Prince Fielder slammed the Italian-themed restaurant for “tiny portions” and “cutting off the breadsticks after only three baskets.” The review, posted on DetroitTigers.com, has since been clicked on nearly a million times.
“Are the breadsticks tasty?” mused Fielder at one point during the scathing assessment. “I wouldn’t know. It’s kinda hard to get a sense of their flavor after only three baskets. Apparently, the Garden has some sort of limit. They may pretend I’m ‘family’ but nobody in my family ever sent the manager over to explain why I couldn’t have more food.”
Unlike Hegarty, who was taken in by the Tuscan-inspired ambiance, Fielder was not impressed.
“I guess people in Tuscany must be like 80 pounds or something,” he said. “That’s the only explanation for these tiny booths and portions fit for a child. I don’t care if the waiters are wearing ties or the doorways are arched — I want more damn cheese-covered noodles.”