Confirming rumor that started weeks ago, CBS Sports president Sean McManus announced that the NCAA basketball tournament would no longer be called “March Madness.” Instead, it will now be known as “March Men without Hats.”

“It’s tough,” McManus said at a hastily prepared news conference, “but dealing with one hit wonder bands is tough. I have Madness’ ‘Our House’ as my ringtone when Jim Nantz sends me a text. But we think most of our fans can sing all the words to ‘The Safety Dance,’ and we are already thinking of clever ways of working it into our coverage.”

Big Ten commissioner Jim Delany said he had mixed emotions about the move, but he understands the landscape of college sports can be fickle.

“I thought we should have gone old school with Simon and Garfunkel’s ‘Slow Down, You Move too Fast’,” Delany said. “That would have been perfect for our teams.”