Desperate for help in goal, the Chicago Blackhawks made a huge trade on Friday, acquiring Disney’s Mighty Ducks goaltender Greg Goldberg.

The trade is expected to be an improvement over the current .543 saves percentage the Blackhawks goaltenders have sported. Rumors have also been swirling around that coach Joel Quenneville has been experimenting with new approaches to get the team back to its old form.

“We’ve been working on a flying V formation in practice,” he said.”Our team has also been in talks about bringing over Charlie ‘triple-deke’ Conway, that guy from Saturday Night Live who shoots the knuckle puck, and coach Gordon Bombay, just in case we ever run into Iceland on our next road trip.”

Brew Dreesus