The trash talking built during the waning moments of the Bears’ victory over the Seahawks, and has reached a crescendo in the hours since.
“It’s all ‘Bears suck’ … ‘Packers blow’ … the status updates have been off the charts,” said Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg. “We haven’t seen this much activity since Farmville went live.”
According to Zuckerberg, over six million terabytes of trash talking between Illinois and Wisconsin residents has snowballed into a generally adversarial mood on Facebook, prompting insults among other groups as well.
“The trash talking has spread from Midwest sports fans to national sports fans to general Facebook users across the world,” he said. “Within two hours of the Bears’ victory, people all over the globe absolutely hated each other, and have been making outrageous bets on the outcome of everything from football games to weather patterns.”
United Nations spokesman Henry Marin urged restraint among the many peoples of the world.
“This game could be a watershed moment in our planet’s history,” he said. “Hopefully we survive it intact. Oh, and go Bears! Screw those damn cheeseheads! They suck!”