Brothers Tom and Todd Ricketts will be performing their self-titled Ricketts Robot mime routine outside the Hilton this weekend in an attempt to raise money for repairs to Wrigley Field. The pair donned silver paint and duct tape while they danced to music from the 1980s blaring from a large boom box.

“We are thinking outside the box to help increase fan awareness of the possible $200 million worth of renovations that are necessary at the stadium. We’re hoping to raise enough money to renovate a men’s room today,” said Tom, while pointing to the bucket near the brothers’ performance area. “My parents sent us to performance art camp when we were kids, and I feel that we have an opportunity to bring those valuable skills to our most pressing objectives now.”

Todd Ricketts, holding a sign reading “Ricketts Robots Rock for Wrigley,” agreed.

“Dude, the last time we brought out the Ricketts Robot, it was our high school talent show and we won a gift certificate to Applebee’s,” he said. “It was one of the most awesome nights of my life.”

Fans at the convention had mixed feelings on the fundraising efforts.

“I think the outrageous prices I’m paying for tickets in the bleachers should be enough to pay for something,” said season ticket holder John Franklin. “Like a closer, or Soriano being able to find the cutoff man.”

On the other end of the spectrum, Lakeview native Lindsay Horton happily donated a few quarters.

“Why not give to Wrigley Field?” she asked. “I mean, I don’t see a return on what I give to those bucket boys, but these two dorks they hired to dance are ridiculously entertaining.”

By Marci Van Gilder-Rubin | Photoshop by Kurt Evans