New Cubs manager Mike Quade was mistaken for Mr. Clean by a large group of Cubs fans while washing his car last week, team sources have confirmed. The cue-balled skipper was at a self-wash station wearing a short sleeve shirt, and sporting a newly acquired gold hoop earring.

At the time, his arms were crossed as he waited for the car to dry, leading a young child at the car wash to exclaim, “Mr. Clean is real! I knew it!”

Quade took the case of mistaken identity well.

“I wanted to get a gold earring like the one Michael Jordan used to wear, so I could maybe get into a Fruit of the Loom commercial with him,” said Quade. “A sort of ‘Chicago’s two Mikes’ kind of thing. I guess I failed to realize how startling a resemblance I have to Mr. Clean. Really, I should have just thought that idea through a little bit more.”

Quade’s agent confirmed that the new skipper was unable to land his Fruit of the Loom gig, but he is in talks with the Mr. Clean company to replace the original animated spokesperson.

By Jeff GoodSmith | Photoshop by Kurt Evans

Jeff GoodSmith