With Spring Training underway, Cubs management decided to hold a reality contest to replace fifth starter Jason Marquis in the rotation after he was dealt to the Rockies last month. Cubs GM Jim Hendry stated his rationale for the unorthodox move at a press conference unveiliing “Who Wants to Be the 5th Starter?””It shouldn’t be too hard finding a replacement for Marquis,” said Hendry, “You figure some hack off the street could pitch better than he did.”
There were mixed reactions throughout the Cubs clubhouse about holding the contest. Left fielder Alfonso Soriano was excited about the move.
“I can’t wait to see who wins this thing,” said Soriano. “With any luck they can teach me how to hit a slider too.”
Applications to participate in the contest have begun pouring in. Chicago native Joey Wyskewski presented his case for being the Cubs starter.
“I was hammered 100 percent of the time when I pitched in our softball league this year,” said Wyskewski. “Even then I threw a better game than Marquis, so suit me up.”