Quarterback Rex Grossman is officially a free agent, meaning his tumultous six-year run with the Bears has most certainly ended. Meanwhile, GM Jerry Angelo is confident he can find a mediocre free agent or draft pick to fill Grossman’s shoes.

“The Chicago Bears have a long history of mediocre-at-best quarterbacks,” said Angelo. “Rex’s departure opens the door for us to sign another equally mediocre quarterback.”

While the ever-shrewd Angelo refused to reveal the list of mediocre QBs he was targeting, insiders suggest the Bears might pursue Charlie Batch, Chris Simms, Dan Orlovsky or even the less-than-mediocre Brooks Bollinger. If his plans to sign any of those three fall through, Angelo will most likely use a mid-level draft pick on a QB like Michigan State’s Brian Hoyer or Arizona State’s Rudy Carpenter.

“Anything we can do to continue the tradition of mediocre QBs,” said Angelo. “It is the Bear way afterall.”

heckler editorial staff