Finding a loophole in the college football eligibility rules, Bears QB Rex Grossman figured he would give his alma mater Florida Gators a boost by offering to play in tonight’s National Championship game versus the Ohio State Buckeyes. His bid, however, was turned down by Florida head coach Urban Meyer.


Grossman says he has one game of eligibility left because he missed a game during his freshman year due to injury.


“I’ve been watching Bears games, he has done nothing but throw interceptions for the last month,” Meyer said. “[Florida QB] Chris Leak doesn’t need any help. He throws enough picks on his own.”


The Ohio State Buckeyes have also declined the services of an alum. Head coach Jim Tressel says he received a call from ex-Bears quarterback Craig Krenzel over the weekend. Krenzel, who has a degree in Molecular Genetics, was told by Tressel that he’ll stick with Heisman Trophy winner Troy Smith at QB instead.


“I told him to be by the phone in case the game took a weird twist and the coaches had a question about DNA or bacterial plasmids.”

heckler editorial staff