Most people were happy about the Cubs 14-6 win over the Milwaukee Brewers on Tuesday, but not right fielder Jacque Jones.

Jones went 3-5 with a two-run homer, John Mabry added a three-run shot, and Sean Marshall pitched six innings. The team even scored 12 of their 14 runs with two outs. But none of this could cheer up Jones, whose former team, the Minnesota Twins, clinched a spot in the playoffs on Monday.

Phil Nevin, whom the Cubs called upon about 10 weeks too late to fill in for an injured Derrek Lee, convinced the Twins trade for him just weeks ago. Jones said this made him feel even worse.

“Why him? I’ve had to suffer in this city for a whole year. He wasn’t even here that long,” Jones said, shaking his head.

“Why Him?! I’m a mediocre guy playing past my prime! I’m making more than I’m worth! I can be completely average in every way! It’s just not fair.”

Jones would have cried, but did not want to re-aggravate the infected tear duct which caused him to miss several games earlier in the season.

Number of the Day: 0
Years other than this one that John Mabry’s pathetic season numbers would have gone unnoticed in Chicago. (.207 BA, 24 RBI, 5 HR)

heckler editorial staff