Thursday, March 28, 2024

Cavs, Warriors agree to end series early to avoid invitations to White House

“We’ve already won a few,” said Warriors guard Steph Curry, “so we’re good with just packing it in now. We love our fans and it’d be great to add another ring to this hand but I’d rather eat one of LeBron’s socks after an OT loss than have to go to D.C. these days.”

Golden State coach says Festus Ezeli greatest center since Bill Russell

“Ezie’s potential to be an even better player than Russell is unbelievable. The kid didn’t even know what a basketball was until he was 15 years old and now he is on the verge of stardom,” Jackson said of the Nigerian-born pivot man.

Lakers currently California’s fourth best NBA team

After dropping their second game is as many nights, the Lakers dream team is currently 0-2 and flopping away this young season, ranking as the worst of California's four NBA squads.

Bulls playoff hopes shattered after loss to Warriors in second game of the season

"It's disappointing but we had a great run," said PG Derrick Rose. "I'll never forget that great comeback win we had against the Lakers a day earlier in the season opener."

Sexual harrassment suit forces Monta Ellis to play defense for first time ever

"On the basketball court I'm lobbing up 20 to 25 shots a game so I don't have to worry about playing defense," said Ellis. "But in this case they're the ones who are lobbing shots my way, but instead of shots, it's damning evidence like copies unsolicited cell phone photos of my penis that I sent to a woman who worked for the team."