"What a moron!" exclaimed Pujols. "I'm like 20 years older than him and I got myself a 10-year, quarter billion dollar deal! He didn't even bother to screw over all his devoted fans. Such a joke."
“I could have donated them, but I didn’t feel like dragging them all to the Brown Elephant,” Vaughn said.“ Looks like my only hope for a profitable 2012 would be if the Cubs could sign Yu Darvish.”
The Cardinals reportedly lost their superstar Albert Pujols to the Angels because the pious first baseman believed the religiously named team was actually owned by God. There's no word on whether Pujols is now aware the team is actually owned by billboard magnate Arte Moreno, but should he find out and have him sour on the decision, it's too late now as the deal has already been signed.
Cardinals fans are blowing up Twitter today, voicing their displeasure at Albert Pujols, the "trader" first baseman who signed a 10-year contract with the "Angles" today.
Has it really been 15 years since I guided the Ducks to glory against the snobbish varsity squad at Eden Hall Academy in D:3? I guess it has. And now the kids are all grown up and facing the Mighty Blackhawks.