As MLB works to institute a plan to resume play this summer, the Cubs announced they intend to socially distance their players by having megastar Javy Baez play all nine positions at the same time.

“Safety is everyone’s first priority,” Cubs’ manager David Ross said. “We believe we can solve all questions about whether we can resume play safely by simply having Javy Baez play all 9 positions at the same time.”

Medical experts expressed an early vote of confidence for the plan.

“That is a very good option,” Dr. Anthony Fauci said. “If it can be done, then we don’t have to worry so much, we just have to make sure that one player is careful and then it should work no problem.”

Always the gamer, Baez has said he is onboard with whatever the team needs.

“Whatever I need to do so we can play baseball, that is what I am going to do,” said Baez. “Will it be difficult to me? Of course. But nothing is impossible. If you set your mind to something, it’s possible. And if for no other reason I want to do it just to show kids out there that they can do anything as long as they work hard.”

After looking at the Cubs’ one-man plan, other organizations are figuring out which player they would choose if MLB decides to go the one player route. This includes the Angels, who have basically been relying on no one but Mike Trout for the last three or four seasons already.

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