Here we are in Day Whatever of the quarantine. Time for another Wellness Check. This one is with Jen, formerly of The Heckler. Listen here!

Old-school readers of The Heckler will remember Jen from her column chronicling her 20-something life in the bleachers and obsession with Moises Alou (she used to have an “I’d do Alou” shirt).

Sadly, Jen became a grownup around the time she turned 30 and got married, had a baby and got a “serious job.” She’s since moved to Cleveland but she’s still hilarious, as evidenced by this Wellness Check and the quarantine dispatches she’s been posting to Facebook (they’re private but Brad reads an excerpt in the interview and is working very hard to convince Jen to start posting them to

In this interview, we talk about a bunch of stuff, including but not limited to: her daily White Claw consumption habits, punishing people who have “quarantine babies” in nine months, why she thinks her son asked if babies are born with beards, her conspiracy theories on COV-19 and how her porn-watching habits have helped shape them, how the quarantine is impacting her family-planning situation due to a likely condom shortage and postponing her husband’s vasectomy, why she’d like to stock up on Xanax, why Hobby Lobby isn’t essential, what she’d sacrifice for the quarantine to be responsibly lifted, and much much more.