The Lightning have stepped up their restrictions on where Hawks jerseys will be permitted for the duration of the series. The Lightning issued the new restrictions with a press release that states “No number 65 Andrew Shaw jerseys will be permitted within three feet of the Tampa Bay goal at any time during the rest of the 2015 Stanley Cup Finals.”

Tampa made the changes after Lightning players spoke that the constant presence of the no. 65 jerseys were a distraction and the “constant chewing noises generated by the no. 65 jerseys left some players with stomach pains.”

“We still want Blackhawks fans to come down to Florida and enjoy the entire splendor that eastern Florida has to offer, from our world class beaches to our fine dining,” Tampa Mayor Bob Buckhorn said. “We just don’t want them to eat in the immediate vicinity of our net during the game. After the game, you can chew on whatever you want as our residents often do.”

Blackhawks coach Joel Quenneville was noncommittal when asked how the change would impact his strategy and specifically the power play unit. “We’ve got to deal with the hand we’re dealt, specifically we may have to ramp up our pre-game meal offerings. The challenge is we’re getting complaints that everything seems to taste Swedish and no one is a real fan of Swedish cuisine.”

When asked if the restrictions violated any NHL rules Commissioner Gary Bettman said, “We have great respect for the league’s strong traditional and heritage, but at the same time I’m told that this generates more money for the league via other Blackhawks jersey sales so I’ll allow it.”

Giles Tellum