Blackhawks fan Shelley Miller of Palatine has watched every minute of this year’s playoffs and has very strong opinions about the play of her favorite Hawk, forward Patrick Sharp.

“This isn’t the Sharpie I know and love,” said Miller after the Hawks’ 6-2 loss to the Kings Wednesday night. “He’s just not playing like himself. He must be hurt and I’m just the person to nurse him back to health.”

Miller, a 43-year-old mother of three, said she’s been calling the Blackhawks nonstop since Sharp’s performance seemed to taper off offering her services.

“I know Patrick has a wife, and I respect that,” said Miller, “but I can’t help but wonder if the TLC of a well-experienced mother like me might be what helps get him back to where the Hawks need him.”

Miller said she has unlimited experience mending “boo-boos” of all shapes and sizes, including whatever might be ailing Sharp.

“Maybe Sharpie needs a deep tissue massage,” said Miller, while wiping sweat from her brow. “That’s something I can help with.”

Miller added that she even owns a never-used “Naughty Nurse” outfit that she would be happy to wear should she get the call to mend her star.

“I got it a few years ago to surprise my husband after he had back surgery, but two of the kids came down with the flu that night so our fantasy had to be put on hold,” said Miller. “I’d have to dig the costume out of the attic, but if it helps the cause, I’m happy to do it.

“I just want to say one more time: Patrick, I’m here for you.”

hecklerstaff